It’s that time of the year when our hearts seem to connect to and long for the idea of peace more than ever. Ironically, it is also a time when we are so busy that we sometimes forget to breathe.

I know exactly how hard it is to take a few minutes; there is always something more important to do. We are so busy “doing” that we forget to nurture ourselves. We often fall prey to reactive behavior with our kids because we are frazzled and tired.

Putting things into perspective requires that you connect to your inner source of peace and centre your “doing” around that. No one, who is lying on their death bed ever thinks, ” I should have cleaned my house more”, or “I should have spent more time at the office”. We don’t need to wait until we run out of time in order to turn inward to our inner voice and listen to what our hearts are trying to tell us in any given situation.

Doing this only requires a shift in focus and a willingness to participate in gaining perspective. This is applying conscious awareness on a practical level. This is how you can, bit by bit, move into the peace that is at the core of your being.Here are a few tips on finding a way to your peace. As you begin to make a habit of shifting into this mind-set, your children WILL respond to the energy that you are emanating regardless of how busy you are. Your children will naturally feel your peace and this in turn helps them feel safe.

Remember that YOU are the brightest and biggest star in their sky, they are watching and feeling what you are living.

1) There is no peace when you are exhausted overworked and overloaded. Please, find one way that you can energize yourself, eat food that supports your body and rest just a little bit more. If this means scheduling a time slot in your agenda for self care then do that, even if it is for only 20 minutes every second day.

When your reactions are triggered, STOP and ask yourself in the moment, what need do I have right now that is not being met (i.e do I need to be heard, do I need to be respected, do I need to be appreciated, do I need to feel support?) and determine how your reaction automatically attaches itself to that need – as if you are on autopilot. Deepen your understanding of how to take care of your needs so you are no longer being ruled by your automatic responses.

2) Prioritize your time effectively.
Make a list of all the big, urgent things, then add in the smaller “must do” things. Say no to projects that stretch you beyond your ability to cope. Stay focused but do not try to control the life that is unfolding in front of you; instead be open to the possibilities that arise to support and guide you.

This is a transformational yet simple concept. Put your situation into perspective. Take it further and put your life into perspective. Take it further and put your inner purpose into perspective. Go deeper and put your relationship with your child into perspective. Now step back and take a look at what is the most important thing for your inner spirit in this moment, not your personality, mind and ego.

When you have found that place of awareness, you are at the stillpoint of peace. From here you can “do” the daily and practical aspects of your life from the perspective of wakefulness and awareness.

4) Set your intention every morning for the day with the feeling you wish you move into your day with. Be very aware of that first thought you have in the morning. Be very present to the first emotion you have at the beginning of the day. Clear your mind for 5 minutes and breathe deeply. Focus on the stillpoint at the centre of yourself and intend to CREATE your day. You are no longer willing to be pulled this way and that, you are now going forward with the intention of deliberately creating your day. May you find your peace and may you and your family enjoy the special love and light of this holiday season.

Take a moment over the holidays to feel your own inner child and offer your unique gift of love and gentleness to yourself.

May the bonds between you and your child strengthen and deepen on your remarkable journey together.

Melinda Asztalos is a parent coach, speaker, author and the founder of Life Positive by Design. She assists parents through a conscious parenting process that enables them to achieve and sustain, positive solutions to their specific parenting challenges. For more information, Please visit:
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